Pittsburgh, PA, OR
Image: Noble Voices
As a boy, Andy Kehoe dreamt of being a motorcycle stuntman in a John Woo-like action film. In May 1998, a friend in the biz recommended him, and he finally got his shot. He was to be motorcycle thug #3 in a low budget action movie starring some Asian guy. Andy spent four months training and growing a moustache. His skills… Impeccable. His look… Perfection. Then came his big moment. A stunt in which Andy hits a ramp at moderate speed and jumps over exploding barrels while shooting a sub machine gun wildly in the air. Instead of being nervous, Andy turned stupid brave with an extreme case of Fuck-It-All. This caused him to make some very poor and inexplicable decisions. When the director yelled for action, Andy took off and within seconds had reached a ridiculous speed of over 70 mph. To the director’s amazement; Andy was firing two handguns instead of the sub machinegun and was wearing no helmet. Even with no hands steering the bike, he managed to pop the bike into a wheelie before hitting the ramp at incredible speed. The bike took off and the barrels exploded on cue into an awesome fireball. The explosion was so hot; it burned off half of Andy’s moustache and sent him veering off course. He missed the landing zone by well over 300 feet and crashed into a stable of horses searing one completely in half. Somehow, Andy escaped with only minor injuries. He was labeled: "'Reckless."... "A loose cannon."... "A disgrace." He and his shameful half-stache never worked in showbiz again.
Andy Kehoe now lives in Portland, OR and makes art for a living.